The Four Words That Can Change a Life

This is a photo of my mom giving me a scalp massage. Since the time I was born she has always had a way of making me feel better and knowing when I needed to most. I often tell the story of one of the most formative moments in my life. When I was a boy and had been called into the principal's office once again to answer for some exuberant behavior, my mother was called in with me. When the principal shook his head and explained how he was concerned about what would become of me as I grew older, my mother spoke up immediately and with fierce conviction. "Don't you worry about him," she said emphatically, "he is going to do great things."

That moment had a profound impact on me. I realized then for the first time just how much my mother really believed in me. This moment had a huge influence on how I saw myself and how much I began to believe in my capabilities. If she believed in me that much, who was I to doubt what I could do? I don't know if she ever realized how much those words meant to me, but they went a long way to shaping the man I would become.

This all came back to me again recently. My mother was planning an eight-week visit to India she had been waiting a lifetime to take. I spoke with her about a week before she was scheduled to leave and I could tell how excited she was. Then I went off on my own trip on business to Switzerland. It was on the day before her departure that I remembered she was going to be leaving and I got on the phone to give her my best wishes for a great trip.

I will never forget her response – she was elated. She had been expecting to hear from me, and when she heard my voice she burst into tears. "I knew you would call," she said. She went on to tell me again how she believed in me and how important it was to her to hear from me before she left. She blessed me and said, "Now I know this trip will be perfect."

That call brought back those early memories of hearing my mother say how much she believed in me, and of how much those words meant to me then. Except this time I got the added satisfaction of realizing how much my words meant to her. Not that I am a mama's boy – well okay, maybe I am a little – but that realization brought tears to my eyes.

There is nothing more profound or motivating that you can say – whether it's to your children, parents, spouse, team members, or patients – than those four simple but powerful words: I believe in you.